Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
