Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
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