I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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