okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
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