as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Randomize
