Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Randomize
