alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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