Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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