I murdered the dance floor call the cops
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize
