Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Randomize
