He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
The second I saw you stumbling down the stairs in a princess crown, I knew I had a friend for life.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Randomize