i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
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