Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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