just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
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