yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Randomize
