you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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