well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
New game I thought of while bored on the train. Anytime I get a text from an ex, I will randomly text a different ex. It's like a less charitable version of pay it forward.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Randomize