Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
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