Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
