She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
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