So drunk its hurt
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
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