So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
