went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
he quoted the bible to break up with me
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Randomize
