i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
