it wasn't lemon gatorade
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Enjoy the penises
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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