You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
wakey wakey hands off snakey
He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Randomize
