yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
