Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
Randomize
