I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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