they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
