Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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