You work out of a Hotel?
I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
You can't special order awesome
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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