Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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