can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
my vag sweat smells like doritos
so now that we're not dating you have to stop sending shit like this to me okay?
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Randomize