Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize
