i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
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