Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
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