I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
