yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
