there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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