it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
