hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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