we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
