cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
