what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
