Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
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