So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Randomize
