So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
