Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Someone stole a lamp last night.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
