i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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