You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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